THE FOLLOWING POST CONTAINS PARAPHRASING
AND MAY NOT ACCURATELY REFLECT WHAT WAS SAID
Around 7:30, I got a text from Mike and Cynthia wondering if I'd like to go to a park. Juggling their offer and someone else's I chose them.
They arrived promptly and we left around 8 PM, listening to a mix tape I had made with my stereo.
Once at the park, I was inclined to take pictures, but unfortunately, the camera was dead. Not wasting time, we went ahead and walked to the lake shore where the water was calm. I had never seen water so calm before. The lights from the university across the lake shown right across the surface.
We walked around for a good hour-and-a-half, speaking about racial harmony, life, jobs, love, and all things Brian Ockert. Around 9.35, we were in the car, telling our most embarrassing poop stories. After a good twenty minutes, we left to the Kroger near my home.
The last time we had gone to the store, about a week ago on Saturday, I had seen SGJ.
As we drove up to the store the week prior, I had made up my mind that I would ask him his name. I had always wondered what it was, so when we went in, he greeted us with "You guys again?" There was some light banter before we did the shopping.
When coming back to the self-checkout stands, I figured he'd be standing close. Wrong.
He was leaning on some carts used as a barrier, eight-to-ten feet from the door. I wanted to make it as natural as possible, and with him so out of the way, it was just going to be awkward. I just decided to "fuck it" and left disappointed.
Fast-forward to today, 10 PM.
We drove up and I spotted him at the entrance of the store. I again told Mike and Cynthia, "I am definitely going to ask him his name." Parking the car next to a family, I saw SGJ walk inside the store.
Walking from the car, Cynthia stopped to look at the plant display the store had place out front. As we "smelled the flowers", I noticed that SGJ had moved position. I think he saw us, and he was moving to greet us. He was standing where I had first seen him months before.
Walking through the foyer, he stood behind a security door alarm and as we crossed the threshold, he greeted us and he returned the favor. Good rapport with him and all.
Cynthia and Mike did their shopping, and I bought along a .50 muffin thing. Just because a muffin is crumbled doesn't mean it's good.
As we walked to the self-checkout counters, SGJ was no where in sight. "Shit" I thought, "So much for asking him his name." We were at the counter for a minute or so while M&C fed the machine change, including my .50 cents for the muffins.
Once the bill had been paid, we began our walk outside.
Honestly, I was a little disappointed that I hadn't seen SGJ because I was really going to ask him, whether or not it was convenient.
As we exited the foyer, I saw SGJ walking away from a car ten feet from the entrance. As we walked out, he was right in front of us. I decided then and there that I would ask him.
It was a split-second decision. I got my cajones and as he walked up to me, I stopped him...
"You know, we've been seeing you around for four months and we were wondering, what's your name?"
*heart racing guys*
He extended his hand out, and I reached for it. "My name is Joshua."
DUM DUM DUM!
I got this look on my face, let out a little chuckle, and he asked, "What's wrong?"
"Nothing," I said. "It's just because we've been-- we nicknamed you Security Guard Josh-- since the first time we saw you in January! It's just that you look so much like my friend Josh who went into the military in November. It's just been weird that your name actually is Josh."
Josh quickly replied, "It's alright. I get that all the time. Actually, I know Josh [...]. He fucked my girlfriend."
Mike, Cynthia, and I were completely taken aback at hearing that. I didn't know that they had even met each other, let alone know about their existences.
He asked us where we went to school, and answered that we went to [the northern high school]. He told us that he went to [the southern high school].
"Did any of you go to South?" he asked. Mike answered affirmatively, saying "I went there for my freshman and sophomore years." Then they spoke about going to the same middle school, but missing each other by two years, with Joshua answering with "I would have been there when you were a freshman."
After some more banter, Mike started asking about his job. He told us that he had been working there since January and that he had gotten it from a security company in a suburb of Dallas. Josh told us of their process, going from them "losing" your application (to weed out the "untouchables"), to training you, certifying you, and finally putting you out in the field.
Asking about his pay, "I get paid $10 to stand here and watch the front of store. There's usually plain-clothed guards walking about the store, looking out for (shoplifters). Armed guards get paid $16 an hour, and have a gun on their belt."
Impressed by the amount, I said to him, "So they must want the strong, alert type, right?"
"Not at all. When I was doing my training, there was like this 69-year-old guy there. He could barely walk. He's probably watching cameras all day."
From there, the conversation turned to guns.
We were talking about the Assault Weapons Ban put forth by Senator Feinstein of California, and he said he was more for psychiatric tests than for a ban. Joshua reasoned with this, "People will find a way to get (banned guns) from the black market. If you want them badly enough, they'll get them. Then they can modify them illegally to shoot more than they were built to."
Quiet honestly, he made a good point. But I countered with, "But no one NEEDS an AR-15. I'm talking about guns that are made for militaristic purposes. And I think that those who already have them should be grandfathered in. If you have them, great. We won't take them away..."
I was interrupted by Mike giving his own point, but as it was the end of my thought, I just leaned up against a stone pillar.
For a good forty minutes, we talked about other things, including immigration and other social policies. Although a self-proclaimed conservative, Joshua supports the legalization of marijuana (as do I), right for same-sex couples to marry, etc.
We finished the night by this weird spouting of psuedo-conspiracies. As he explained how the fear of the government taking guns away made people go out and buy more guns, that led to more purchases of ammunition and the material needed for their upkeep. "What does that led to?" he said, "It leads to increased profit. And who makes most of the world's firepower? The United States. Leads to more supply, more jobs, more profit, higher wages."
It made good sense, and I mentioned that I had told someone else this, but that they just blew it off.
After a good hour of talking, it was getting late (and feet were hurting), so around 11.10, we decided to go.
Before we did, I said, "Hold on, did we introduce ourselves?"
Everyone turned back at me with a look of confusion.
Mike turned to me and said, "Did we abuse ourselves?" Josh said that he thought I had said that, too.
"No, not 'abusing ourselves'; 'introduce ourselves'! Did we [tell him our names]?"
Now in understanding, I started with myself, and introduced Mike and Cynthia.
We waved good-bye and walked back to the car. Once inside, I told them my disbelief in thinking that we had been calling him by his REAL name the entire time. I guess that's what happens when you hang on to something you like.
Next time, America, we'll see how SGJ reacts to having a friendly hand reaching out to him.
COMING SOON TO THE ESF! LOL.
