Time to get turnt up!
In January last year, I decided that it was best to drop all of what had caused me to start this precious jewel in the first place. I came to that conclusion 50% naturally, 90% Lupe's scorn. I think I've been doing pretty well in the year and six months since, A+ really.
Every now and again, old habits slip in like a son-of-a-bitch.
Last night. Pre-flight. Zero hour. 5AM.
I had woken up at 4.45AM after a night of tossing and turning. After a drink and some Netflix, I fell into an easy sleep.
I dreamt that I was driving to a community college to start out the school year. After parking, I went inside the main building, entering a semi-circular lobby. Three entrances kept the flow of people constant; in the back, there were tables stacked with schedules.
This is where old habits die hard.
I decided that before I looked for mine, I'd look for HoJoKo's. "Why not?"
(Assuming that we would attend the same school... which we nearly did.)
On one of the many tables, I found his schedule, printed on purple paper, his full name listed next to a room number: 500. There was only one copy, so I had to leave it. I went on the look for mine, and found it on the table for last names starting with "S". Unlike the other schedules, mine was printed on pink paper. Also unlike the others, mine had a monochrome photo of me next to my name. The room number was also "500".
As I picked up the schedule, a woman sitting behind the table stopped me and told me that I could not take it until I turned in paperwork. "Oh, OK. I'll be back then." I had no real intention in returning, but whatever.
I walked across the room into another doorway. This led into another circular lobby, with an entire wall composed of tall glass panes that looked out into a green space. Along the glass wall was a ramp leading up into a hallway. I walked to the ramp, following it up into a hallway higher than ground level. As I looked back to where I had entered, I saw Lupe and HoJoKo. They had their schedules in hand, probably on the hunt for their respective rooms. As soon as I caught sight of them, I ran up the rest of the ramp into the hallway.
"Maybe they didn't see me."
Unfortunately, the hallway dead-ended with a door at the back and one on either wall. I walked to the end of the hallway and turned my back to them. Lupe and HoJoKo walked in and made their way towards me. He dropped her off in the back classroom, walking out alone. I had started walking back into the lobby when his voice stopped me.
"Eddie!"
I stopped dead and turned around. There was HoJoKo, standing, his left arm out calling me back. I walked back apprehensively to him, and he pointed me inside. The number on the door read "500" and it looks like I had found my destination.
The classroom was really more of a small library-slash-terraced classroom with three levels. The topmost had the shelves filled with books along the back wall. The other two levels had tables tables turned width-wise to fit the terrace with two chairs on either side. He led me down to ground level and pulled me out a chair. I sat down and he did the same.
A professor was writing names on a dry-erase board in red ink in front of us. He smiled at the both of us, and went back to writing "Professor Ferrar" in the upper left hand corner.
 |
| The dream campus |
We sat inches from each other and he looked straight at me. I felt uncomfortable with him staring at me, but neither of us said anything. After a minute or so, he said, "Okay, look, things are fucked up. We both know they are. I wanna make things cool. Can't let this shit go on forever."
Wait, wut?
"I want to make things better, too. Before we go at it, I want to say something. Sometimes things just happen on a slippery slope. You try to change things, but them more you try, the more fucked-up they become. And then it's too late to do anything."
He puts his hands on his knees, "How did it all get so fucked up?"
We went on for a while, probably 20 minutes or so. At the end of our conversation, he stood up and held his hand out.
"Cool?"
"Uh... cool."
We shook for what seemed forever.
Later on, the situation switched to inside Lupe's kitchen. It was me, her, and HoJoKo. HoJo and I were sitting at an island while Lupe got this pitcher full of milk. We served ourselves and started eating cookies.
Strange ending, or the best ever?
My brother woke me up at 7.25 to take him to school and as I sat up in bed, I felt calm. As if an ease had settled into me. It took me a minute to realize that it had been a dream, although it felt real enough. I am not completely sure why I dreamt it, but it was a good dream.
Dreams that make you wake up calm from are the best.
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